
Is Your Way In Your Way?
Empowering women to overcome self-imposed barriers, self-sabotaging behaviors, imposter syndrome, and burnout, preventing them from living their best lives on their terms. Do you feel stuck? Do you need help discovering your purpose or what your best life truly is? This podcast provides inspiration, tools, and strategies for women to live a purpose-filled life of hope, aspiration, and fulfillment. Tune in to reclaim your power and unlock your full potential!
Is Your Way In Your Way?
From Trauma to Triumph: A Three-Step Process for Life Transformation
Neena Perez shares her powerful journey from abuse, teen pregnancy, and poverty to becoming a successful transformational coach, author, and speaker. Through her three-step process of inner healing, transcending unwanted behaviors, and co-creation, she empowers women to turn their wisdom into wealth and vision into impact.
• Overcoming shame that doesn't belong to you is crucial for personal transformation
• Recognize the difference between shame from being harmed versus shame from causing harm
• Taking ownership of your current situation rather than making excuses
• Eliminate "I try" from your vocabulary as it indicates you're not fully committed
• Identifying your unique worth, wisdom, knowledge, and skills is essential for business success
• Creating impact should be prioritized over simply making money
• Faith provides creative inspiration and guidance during entrepreneurship challenges
• Surround yourself with people who are smarter than you to elevate your thinking
• Break down goals into actionable steps by writing them down and reverse engineering
• Technical barriers are often excuses—start with free tools and focus on showing up consistently
Visit Neena's website at www.http://neenaperez.com—Turn Your Wisdom To Wealth to download her free ebook and checklist, which provides a 90-day framework for starting your coaching business.
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- X: Cassandra Crawley Mayo
Say my way Cassandra, Thank you for having me.
Cassandra:I'm glad to be here. Okay, I'm excited about our conversation guys. Hey, our topic today is going to be a three-step process to transform your life and business, and I am certain, during this time, that you guys are going to get some gains, some actionable insight about overcoming your barriers, cultivating your resilience and building a value driven business, because many of you all on this podcast today is looking to do something different, and perhaps your business and you just not had an opportunity or you just haven't pivoted and made that move, take that action. So, before we move further, I want to read a bit about Neena, just so you can get her background a little bit. I mean, we're not going to she's going to delve in it later but I just want you to get an understanding of what she's about and how all of this information that we're going to talk about came to fruition for her.
Cassandra:Neena is a transformational coach. She's an author of Hit Me With your Best Shot, a speaker dedicated to empowering women to transition into entrepreneurship and build an impactful coaching business. But, based on the information that I've read about Neena and the work that she does, it definitely may be a coaching business or it could be a different kind of business? I don't know, so let's talk about that. And drawing from her journey of overcoming excuses, abuse, teen pregnancy and poverty, she inspires women to embrace their strength, faith and purpose. Through her Wisdom to Wealth program, she helps women heal, shift their mindsets and create profitability, value-driven business using her three-step process, which is an inner healing transcending unwanted behaviors and co-creation, and her mission is to turn wisdom into wealth and vision into impact. I love that, neena, wow, thank you. I'm certain your backstory had something to do with what you are doing today. Excuse me, excuse me. So, neena, tell us a bit about your what I'm calling your backstory.
Neena:Oh, my backstory. Ooh girl, you want to go there, let's do it, let's do it. So my backstory what's?
Cassandra:happened to you to do the work that you're doing? What went on back in those days?
Neena:You know I had a very tumultuous upbringing. I call it colorful now because now that God has gotten me through all of the pain and all of the shame and all the unforgiveness and all that stuff in my life child and, you know, not protected or watched over. And then you know, I had a kid at 15 years old I my life was almost ended, you know, by a domestic violence relationship when I was about 18 or so, lived in shelters, like really struggled in my life a lot, but always had this tenacity inside of me, like it just felt like you would knock me down and not be like I'm going to go higher now, you know, like that kind of thing. And so I really attribute that to to God. And in my life right now I didn't always have God. I started with um, you know, my, my grandmother always used to take us to like the Catholic church and stuff and all that kind of stuff, but then I kind of veered off and then I'm so grateful because God found me in the middle of my mess and has really helped my life.
Neena:And so what happened is is that I realized that I was living my life a lot being stuck in shame a lot, and a lot of that I was in shame of wasn't even my shame to carry, you know. You know being hurt, being molested, being beaten, all those kinds of things in my life. I was ashamed of all of that. But I realized that, you know, god kind of straightened me out one time because I realized there's two types of shame. There's the shame of that someone gives you and that you take on as your own, and then there's things that you should be ashamed of, like if I went to your house and I robbed your purse, I should be ashamed of that. That shame would then change the trajectory of my life and I wouldn't do that again because you feel ashamed.
Neena:Now. Then there's that shame that somebody does something to you and you still carry it as if it's yours to carry, and so I had to really start recognizing that I don't have to carry that and that that shame belongs to the person who caused that harm, not to me. And so forgiveness played a big part in it. Releasing that shame played a big part in it, and, you know, just really realizing that there's invisible barriers in our life that hold us down. And the first step is to dig deep. You need to recognize what these limiting beliefs are in your life and how this is stopping you from becoming all that you're supposed to be while you're still here, cause we're not promised tomorrow, so we should make today be valuable.
Neena:Yes, yes, that's, that's good, and you know what A lot of listeners and even myself, I think for me I had shame about things that I've gone through in my life and then I decided that if I can't control it, let it go. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's kind of like, and that kind of helped me overcome a lot of things that have occurred in my life, and so I'm glad that you said you know what. You kind of made up your mind and said look, number one, I know I need to forgive what those individuals have done or whatever happened in my life. I need to forgive them, but, more importantly, I need to let it go and in order to do that, you just have to make that decision, to do that Now.
Neena:But how did you overcome all of that? You know because we're going to talk about mindset, but I'm sure personal and professional challenges that has led you to do the work today. So tell us, how did you get over and maybe you're not over it, you know, perhaps you know you always remember it, but it's not holding you back. How did you overcome that from your perspective? Because I know a lot of listeners are like, yeah, yeah, yeah, but I'm trying real hard and you know that emotional and I say that mental can keep you stuck.
Neena:Yeah, 100%, you could have been just stuck and stayed in that space.
Neena:I always ask myself the question if it's serving me at all. Right, so if I'm complaining about something, if I have lack of something, if I feel stuck in something, I'm like, is this serving me at all? Like, is this serving me at all? And if it's not serving me, I kind of just give it to God and let it go because I don't have time. And I always say that I don't have time because we don't.
Neena:Cassandra, like right before we got into this call, we talked about how fast our life is going. It's like the older you get, the faster your life goes. Do we really have the time, the space, the mental capacity to keep holding onto things that are holding you back? Now, the truth is if I can be real is you're going to have to take ownership. You got to take ownership. If you're stuck, then you need to stop and pause and ask yourself why you are stuck and stop leaning on the I'm stuck mentality and start doing something about it. And so nobody can do that but you. And so you have to be super responsible for who you are, have some self-compassion for you, have self-forgiveness for you, and so you have to be super responsible for who you are, have some self compassion for you, have self forgiveness for you. Now, yes, you might have messed up and you might have done things wrong, and you messed up on this financial thing, or you messed up and you got yourself in debt, or you messed up in your relationships. Okay, yes, you did.
Neena:Now can we look at that. What's the lesson? And then move forward? You cannot keep living in the past and living back, where you will constantly be stuck and see that our brains are built that way. They know that we've already done that, we've already gone through that and we didn't die. So the brain is like oh, okay, so this keeps us safe. So being stuck keeps you safe. Being in drama keeps you safe. You know, being um, uh, having limiting beliefs keeps you safe. So being stuck keeps you safe. Being in drama keeps you safe. You know being having limiting beliefs keeps you safe. You have to reprogram yourself, and the way to do that is by renewing your mind and like you said Cassandra, if I can't change it, let it go.
Neena:Well, if you can't change it, don't. Try to just keep it moving and change the things that you can. Now, I know that's kind of straight talk and people are always like oh yeah, nina, but how Listen? The first word I want you to take out of your vocabulary is the I try. That's BS. When you say I try, that means you're not doing it. That means you're trying so that your brain thinks that, ok, we're trying and you don't have to change. That's BS. I'm sorry, but when you say I try, that's literally you saying I'm not doing it. Right.
Neena:It's like when somebody invites you to a party that you don't want to go to and you always say I'm going to try to make it. You know darn well, you ain't going to try to make it. You are not supposed to have parties that you don't want to go. Right, right. And we know you're not into thinking that right, like I've done that so many years and like I'll try to lose weight but I don't lose weight because I'm trying Right.
Cassandra:It's when I actually say I am is when I do it Exactly, and so we have the power to shift our thinking.
Neena:You have the power to think differently because it's your mind. You have the power to let go of whoever did what, when and where to you, because only you can control that. And I always say this, cassandra, like when we hold on to unforgiveness or shame or something like that we think we're living our lives, but we're not. And so what's happening? This is the way I see it. The person who did that to you, or whatever happened to you, almost has a remote control to your life, and so they're not even near you, but they're controlling where you go, left and right, and what I mean by that is you start making decisions that are not really performing for you, based on past hurts, pains and ideas, right. So they say, oh, I hurt you, so turn left, and you're like you know, I was going to take that opportunity, but let me turn left. I was going to do this, but I'm afraid let me turn right, and so that remote control is still controlling you from the past.
Neena:It is time to take out the batteries of the remote control and just like let it go. The truth of the matter is is you can let it go and I know a lot of people are like it's hard to let it go. Listen to me I have been raped, I have been beaten, I have had abortions, I have almost been murdered with a gun to my head. I have been through stuff. So don't tell me that you can't get through things, because, yes, you can, and when people come to me, I'm probably the worst person for people to come to to tell me that they can't, because I've been through so much in my life that I wrote my autobiography. So people have read my book. But it's like I've been through so much and I know that you can because I, I did, I did, yeah good, right, good, yeah, absolutely, let's keep it moving right.
Cassandra:So that autobiography hit me with your best shot. Is that where that came from? Yeah, exactly.
Neena:OK.
Cassandra:OK, wow, that triggered that. Well, look, because, like, we're all going to always trials and tribulations is a given, we're going to always have those based on the tribulations, the trials, the things that you've gone through and, as you indicate, you're not the only one, everybody has stuff going on. So, based on all that you had happening to you, for you and with you, what, what inspired you to turn all of that stuff and become a coach, to start transit, what, what was it about that that you like I think I found what I'm supposed to be to do? Was it the testimony, your tests? Is that because of your tests that you went through? Is that why you decided to get into the coaching?
Neena:Yeah, you know, when I went into Christian spiritual leadership in like 2002, I was really afraid, right, because you are always like on display, right. So I had I had no women at first, and then one woman, and then, before I knew it, my house was so full I didn't know where to put all these women. And then it just grew from there and that's the thing. Like what started it was as I started to heal, I started to realize that there's more women out there that need healing and as I started to grow in my personal development and all that kind of stuff. And then I wrote my book and then when people read my book, they were coming to me and saying, hey, nina, can I speak with you? Because this happened to me too. My, my father molested me, my brother molested me. This happened to me. There was so much that they were getting out of it and feeling like now they can talk about it, that I was like, wow, okay, I'm like basically helping these women transition and transcend all those behaviors or unwanted mindsets that they have and that became let me go back to school and get my master's in neuro-linguistic programming and let me get um, let me get my coaching um, uh, um, certifications, and let me get my positive intelligence certification.
Neena:I got into hypnosis, I got into a whole bunch of different modalities, a bunch of different modalities, and so that's how it started. It started because once I saw my journey and a women that I was helping and, and those women were changing and transforming before my eyes and I realized that God gave me this gift to be able to reach into the lives of others and see their greatness, and that helped me then develop what I have today. So today it's a little. It's it's a blend of your personal development and growth and building your own coaching business. So it's a blend of both. And it's because, as I became a coach, I realized it's hard, like I know all these gurus tell you it's easy. It's not. You do a lot of this journey alone and I don't want any woman to be alone.
Cassandra:Period, right, I'm so glad you said that because, based on society, everyone wants a quick fix. They want a quick fix, so therefore they do other things to mask it, like alcohol or or sex, or shopping, or scroll on social media, or so it sounds like People who really want to do something different. They have made up their mind. I can either be bitter with this life that I've been given or better. It sounds like those individuals that came to you like you know what I want? To be better, I want to do things.
Cassandra:I'm glad there's somebody out there that I can talk to, that I feel safe, because that's why we fear, because we're trying to protect ourselves, as you indicated you just told it all you know and by being authentic, which I think is amazing, because when you people are looking for authenticity, looking for people to be real and also to know for a fact that what you have done and the work you've done, it didn't come overnight. It's a self-discovery journey, so you have to be sounds like you have to be ready for it and those individuals that really want to start living their life on their terms, their best life. I'm glad you mentioned it's going to take time and don't be afraid of time, because if that's something you have to do, you're going to be given the time you know. So don't let life just pass you by.
Neena:Right, and one step leads to another, though, right, cassandra? Like if we look, if we look back in our lives, I'm 52. And when I look back at the journey I've had, I took one step at a time. That's how I got to where I am. I mean, I didn't do it overnight, it's. I have a six figure business. It's beautiful. I have amazing women in my group, but I keep my groups really small. My groups are 10 and under right, because I want to be very intentional about being with these women, and so then the next group will come and then the next group, and the truth of the matter is is these women don't ever want to leave me. They end up re-upping to stay with me even longer because I am their friend, I am their strategist, I am their you know co-creator. I am all these things with them, right, with them. It's usually them, me and God just working together and doing and making change in the world. That's all it's about.
Cassandra:Yeah, that's true, that's true. So let's, let's talk about that three-step. I can't wait to get into the three-step process and its impact. Tell us about that.
Neena:Yeah. So, um, the you know, the three-step process is basically the, the whole methodology that I've come up with, which is inner healing, transcending and co-creation. And impact is important because if you're going to just do something for money, then don't expect impact. It's just for money, right? If you're going to expect to do impact, then now we're talking that's my jam, Like I don't, like I don't. I mean, yes, you can build a six figure business. I have all the strategies and tools and I have all the marketing and automation. Okay, great, that's all good. Whatever, I don't care about that. What I care about is does your gifts, your knowledge, your God given talents, all those things do they impact somebody's life, to make their life better? And if it does.
Neena:Now we're talking because the truth is and I really believe this our lives are not just for us. Our lives are to impact our fellow person, another person out there, and it's not just for you. I'm sorry, I know that's that. Maybe he's like oh, but I want money great, go go invent a widget somewhere and go, you know, invent something, and that's great. But I don't want that. I want to work with people who have a mission and a plan, who have something that's inside of them that they know God is calling them to do, and they want to know how to do it. That's all they already have everything they need.
Neena:I'm just going to help them put it into a nice package, get out of their own way, because, cassandra, when you start this entrepreneurial business, let me tell you it's a spiritual journey. Oh yeah, when you start this entrepreneurial business, let me tell you it's a spiritual journey.
Cassandra:Girl, you hit walls.
Neena:You don't think you're good enough, you don't think you're smart enough, you don't think nobody likes you. I mean there's you go through all this spiritual stuff.
Neena:It's crazy but then it's co-creation and then it's um, you know, so it's, it's inner healing. We talk, we, we we don't go into therapy, cause I'm not a therapist Right, talk about what's holding you back. How do we get through those thoughts and how do we transcend them? So how do we find what your core values are, where you are now, where you want to be Like, how do we set goals that really you can hit every quarter, every week, every month, every year? Then we talk about what is truth, what is a lie, because a lot of things we believe are a lie.
Neena:And we need to start thinking about what is true.
Neena:And then the third piece is co-creation, and that's where me, you and God get together, build your business out, and then my team steps in and they do all your funnel building, marketing, automation, all of that stuff, so that your business is from start all the way to you launch, because I found myself being alone a lot and trying to figure out the next step. I don't want that to happen anymore. So the women who come to me, they know like, okay, it's a journey, neena, yes, and I'm going to be with you for a year. Yes, and these are the, these are the modules, this is the piece, this is what we do, and they are super excited and a lot of them have already gone off to create amazing businesses, and I have a whole new group of women right now and it's been going fantastic. So that's what I do. Those are my three steps.
Cassandra:Okay, great, yeah, I was telling you before we came on about the testimonies that you have on your website and the women are super excited, energized. I just love it and just the things that they say. I was like now, does she pay them? Absolutely not. You can tell they are not paying people because it comes from the heart. You can just feel it, you can feel sincerity, and so kudos to you with that. What are the most prominent mindset?
Neena:shifts women must make when transitioning, because that mind yeah, that mind Listen, you are worthy and you are full of worth. Let me tell you, I think, one of the biggest things that I go through with the women that come to me cause they're all like purpose driven, professional women that want to create their own coaching businesses. That's what I do, and when they come to me, they don't realize all of the value and worth that they have. It is incredible how much they go. Oh, I don't know and I don't think I'm putting about what all this stuff.
Neena:Well, when they sign on with me, the first meeting that we have is about an hour and a half to two hours long. We do this whole thing called the foundation step, and that foundation step is a very intricate questions that we start pulling out all of your wisdom, your knowledge, your skillsets, all of that, even your spiritual gifts. We pull all that stuff out and we really and when I show them this, they're like whoa? I'm like, yeah, you have so much wisdom and knowledge and skill sets and all of this stuff and you're telling me that you can't come on now. That ain't the truth. We have to reframe that truth because that is a. That is a lie from the pit of hell and we are not having it Right.
Neena:Because the truth of the matter is, is Cassandra, we all have a gift. We all do. We all have some sort of gift, some sort of passion, some sort of skill set, something that we can utilize to monetize Right. And so I think so. The world tells us we're not good enough. You look at social media too much. You're, we're living your life vicariously through all these liars out there, and you need to stop doing that. Live your life, your life.
Neena:You only have yours, you only have this life. That's it, um, and so, yeah, that's what I that's. The one thing is the worth and value that these women bring is incredible to me, and I just feel like they need to understand their true worth so that they can leverage that you know, oh my gosh, I love that, so it's so.
Cassandra:this is also part of the Wisdom to Wealth program.
Neena:That's correct. Yeah, this is all Wisdom to Wealth. And I do a hybrid model. I don't know a lot of coaches doing it, although I'm hearing more coaches trying to do this now but my hybrid model is we do a group coaching together for 90 minutes every other week where we break down like methodologies and tools and thoughts and all that kind of stuff. We even sometimes just pray or do real brief breath work while we're doing our methodologies, all that kind of stuff, and then but then they also have me for one-on-ones in between for for us to work on their particular issue, business, all of that. So I do a hybrid right, so that these women don't feel like, oh, I got to just pay for a group coaching call and then that's it, right, or they pay one-on-one this premium amount and then that's it. So I actually combine them both so they get to have one and they get to have the group.
Cassandra:Yeah, that's good. Yeah, we all need that one-on-one time right. Yeah, you do. Yeah, we all need that one-on-one time, right, you do? Yeah, yes, we do. So what have you found? The largest or the biggest mistake an entrepreneur makes when they're about to launch?
Neena:Sometimes they don't recognize that they may be spending money they don't need to be spending.
Neena:So for instance like when they're about to launch. They may think oh, I'm about to launch, let me go spend a couple thousand dollars on publicity, let me go spend a couple thousand dollars on ads, Let me go spend thousands of dollars on all this kind of stuff. So we spend a lot of money trying to find the right tools and sometimes what you just need is a very good funnel with good copywriting that highlights who you are, has a great video component to it. You start organically reaching out to people in your groups. You start reaching out to different groups that have your type of person in it. You have to get clear on your niche. Who are you speaking to?
Neena:What I want all of you who are listening or starting a business is to think about. When you think about who you're speaking to. I want you to immediately be able to picture that person in your mind. So that means that I like, for instance, I work with purpose-driven leaders who want to create their own coaching business. I already have her in my mind. I know exactly who she is. Right.
Neena:I don't do that If I don't have my niche down, if I don't have all those things out and I'm going to launch and I think I'm going to speak to everybody, you're in trouble because when you're speaking to everybody, you're speaking to nobody and you're going to spend a lot of money trying to figure that out when you don't have to, right? So I would say the best tool for you is a don't do this alone. Never do this alone, because when you do, I don't care if it's me or whoever you speak you you choose as a coach or a mentor just don't do it alone, because when you do it alone, it takes you way longer and you spend a lot of money.
Neena:I know I've spent over $200,000 trying to figure this out. Right, yeah, right, that's right, yes, so I think that's the biggest thing is spending an exuberant amount of money on publicity or publications or ads and all that kind of stuff when you haven't even launched yet. I don't think that's very wise. I think there's ways to do it that is more strategic and it yes, it may be what you think is slow. I don't. I think it's strategic because you want longevity, not fast, you don't need to shake your butt on TikTok.
Neena:You don't need to do any of that kind of stuff, right?
Cassandra:Exactly.
Neena:You just need to be consistent and show up.
Cassandra:Yeah, oh, wow, that's good. So listen, neena. So how does faith play in entrepreneurship? What role does faith have in all of this?
Neena:I and entrepreneurship. What role does faith have in all of this? I laugh, because without faith I don't know where I would be actually, you know, because there are days that I didn't want to get up. I didn't know what I was doing, what is my purpose, why aren't I aligning, you know, all that kind of stuff and I, I was feeling depressed and a little bit anxious, and all that kind of stuff and scattered, and I had, it just wasn't working. And, um, faith played a big role, because on the days where I didn't have income coming in, on the days where I don't have clients, on the day, on those days is when I go, you know what, let me pull away from my machine, from my computer, from my business, all that kind of stuff and just let me lean on what God's word says, let me wash myself over with who he is and what his word means in my life, and let me start doing that again.
Neena:Because we lose our creativity, cassandra, like when we start to become overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, all those things, we lose our creativity. We don't realize that there's beauty and creativity within us, that we can maybe look at something differently, post something differently, um, you know, maybe add something, a component to your business you never saw before. You know, all that kind of stuff starts coming back If you pull away from all the social media, all of the mainstream media like the news and all that that is toxic, like all that kind of stuff. Right, you got to. You got to protect your ears, your eyes, that's right. So you've got to protect that kind of stuff. And so when I feel overwhelmed, I know it's because I've been too much into what everybody else is doing and not what I should be doing, should be doing Wow, that's so good.
Cassandra:You do what everyone else is doing and not what I should be doing. Should be doing Wow, that's so good.
Neena:You sound like you were on my street like we were doing the same thing, right? Isn't that awesome. Yeah, god is good like that.
Cassandra:So, neena, when you were thinking about all of this, you had your kind of down days. What should I do? I don't know. I kind of know what. Who helped you what? Who was your support system? You know, it's kind of like you said don't do it alone, you know. So, once you're starting and you know that that what you're currently doing is not working for you, you know and you want to do something else, how do you tell us about the support that you get and the support you had? May not be the support my listeners, but I'll give them an idea of individuals that perhaps should be in their circle of influence.
Neena:Well, I surround myself with people of like-minded um, you know passions, right? So when I felt like that, or even though today, like even if I feel like that today, right, I would reach out to my mentor, my coach, because I always believe that we should all have someone that we are invested in, to invest in ourselves. I really believe that. And so I have a coach. But I also have a great spouse who's very supportive but doesn't always understand my entrepreneurial role, because that's not what he does. And so I surround myself with communities. I go and like I um, right now, I'm a part of this really great women's community that I pay for monthly, and I go in there and I'm like, hey, this is what I'm going through and you know. And they're like oh, you should try this or did you look into that? How about pausing?
Neena:Like I, you have to get yourself around like-minded people in order to elevate and get through. Whatever that blockage is Like. Don't be the smartest person in the room. Go into rooms where there are people who are smarter than you so that you can pull through. Otherwise, if you're in the same room with the same people doing the same thing and nobody's elevating, you will not elevate either. It is really hard to pull people up, but it's very easy for people to pull you down, and so you have to be in places where you want to level up.
Cassandra:That's what I do. Yeah, okay, that's excellent, excellent advice. So, individuals that are stuck in their current situation and want to start something new, what advice would you give them?
Neena:just you need, yeah, do you mean anything new? Or what do you mean by start something new?
Cassandra:they just start something new. It's like, you know, in their job it's not working for them. They know that's they supposed to do um here, um, especially when people start like in a, a new year or something like, okay, yeah, that a new year has a tendency to have people like, okay, I can start my life over again. You know all of that kind of thing.
Cassandra:So they think they have a new beginning. So so, even to start something new from what they're currently doing, it could be I'm gonna go off. I'm gonna go off on a tangent. Now. It could be in a toxic relationship. It could be um, I need to move, um, not need I must move, Um, I um want to start a business. I, you know things that they know that they should be doing something different. How do they? What advice would you give them to to start something?
Neena:new. The first thing I'm going to tell you is introspection, right? So you need to really find out why do you want to start something new? Because if you don't know why, you are going to want to start something new two minutes from now, and then five minutes from now, and then 12 months from now and then 16 months. So find out why it is going to want to start something new. Two minutes from now and then five minutes from now, and then 12 months from now and then 16 months. So find out why it is that you want to start something new Now.
Neena:If you're in a toxic relationship, first of all, you should start something new for your own well-being, because I've been in toxic relationships and the world is perfect it is toxic, right, meaning that it intoxicates your entire body, your mind, your soul, your spirit, physically, mentally, socially, all of it. So you need to make a decision. Yes, I love this person, but I need to love me first, and I need to, I need to remove myself from the toxicity. Let's, let's start with that one, because that is something that I feel like too many people make too many excuses for other people who are very toxic in their life and they just stay there in this toxicity. Now I'm not, I'm not. I'm not telling you go get divorced. That's not my thing. I've been married 27 years. That's not what I'm saying. But what I will say is then go get therapy, but you need to start making some steps forward to what it is you want.
Neena:So you want something. I would take a pen, a good old pen and a good old piece of paper and I would list why do I want to start a new venture and what venture would I like to start, and list them all out. Okay, list them all, because what we tend to do is we don't do that and then we're in our heads, we're going through this whole rigmarole and these whole things and we don't do nothing because our brain just stops and goes, forget it. It's too much.
Cassandra:But if you write it down.
Neena:then you can look at it and say, well, I really don't want to do that stuff. I don't want to do crocheting. You know what I'm saying? So let me cross that out. I really like crochet, right, like that kind of stuff. So that's why I always tell people to be intentional about their lives and stop living their life as an NPC and an NPC is a non playing character. You need to stop being an NPC and you need to start being relevant and you need to start being really connected to who you are.
Neena:And so I don't know if anybody's ever played video games, but you always play these video games and in the background you'll see, like the guy standing at the supermarket or the other guy, and they're nothing. They're just digital characters that are standing there doing nothing. They're just part of the back scene.
Neena:Well, are you that person? Are you the person who's just standing there being part of the back scene? Or are you going to be somebody who's in the game, playing the game, the character in the game, right? So grab a piece of paper, grab a pen what do I want to do differently? And write it down. Why do I want to do that? Write it down. You will quickly start to say, wait, if I take this is what I want to do, I want to okay. So I want to start my own coaching business. What does that look like? Ask yourself that. What does it look like to start a coaching business? Hold on, and what kind of coaching business do I want to have? And how do I get there? If you start asking your brain questions, it's going to seek answers, because our brains are built that way. Right? If I say all to you guys, okay, everyone, don't, don't you dare think of a pink elephant. Don't do it. It's a pink elephant. Don't think about it.
Cassandra:What did you think about a pink elephant Right.
Neena:So write it down so that you can look at it and say, oh, okay, do I want to do this? Do I want to start this business? What does it take to start this business? And when you find that that's what you want, then you start to reverse engineer. How do I then start? Oh wait, do I need to do an LLC? Do I need to get a name? Do I need to find out a program that teaches how to do this? Do I need this?
Neena:You see what I'm saying? Like you don't have to be stuck, y'all, you're not stuck. What's happening is that you're in fear, that you don't know the next steps and your brain is telling you we can't do that because it's never done it before. So it doesn't think you can and and you feel quote unquote stuck. But really what it is is you're not being creative, you're being overwhelmed with your thoughts, you're not being intentional. Write it down, people, like it's the simplest writing it down and then looking at it and saying, okay, this is what I want to do. I don't know where to start. Let me Google. How do I start this business on candles? How do I start this business? How do I? You see what I'm saying Like you're not stuck, you're not stuck, and stop telling yourself you're stuck, because when you do that, another excuse for you not to do the next move, so stop it.
Cassandra:Wow, that's excellent. One more question before we talk about how to get in touch with you. Another thing I've noticed in talking to my clients as well that stops them is the technical stuff. Like, okay, I need to get a website, I need to do this, I need to do that, and I love it when you say you can't do everything. We're not right at all right. So how do you help them get around that? Because, that's, I got to do this, I have to do podcasts, I have to do, you know, all of that techie stuff. And I'm finding a lot of people get so stuck around that unless they're in their thirties you know 20, they grew up in the technology. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Neena:And even I have, uh, uh, maybe one or two women that are in their thirties that also get stuck in that, sometimes like they don't want to do it, and here's the thing, but you don't know how to do. Hire someone to do, okay, that's, that's the first thing. But if you can't, let's just say you can't like me, and I can, I'm invested in this. That's too much money, whatever, okay, no problem. Stop thinking about a website if you don't need one right now and stop thinking about it's not necessary, it's not. And the reason I say it's not is because what you need is a really good landing page, somewhere where people can go and grab your free pdf that you created on canva. That's giving people a lot of great value, which, by the way, canva is free. You don't have to pay for the pro and, uh, you can create a landing page for free on MailChimp if you wanted to, right? So there's different ways to do this and for me, like I, I know all the technical stuff because I've done it for a long time, but I don't want to do it, cassandra. So I actually have an entire team that does it now because I don't want to do it, right, and so.
Neena:But when you are in the beginning, you're right. You know why you get stuck, cassandra Cause you're scared, you're afraid and you're scared to move forward. So you're getting yourself stuck in things you don't need. Right, I need a. I need a website before I start. Why? Why do you need a website before you start? That's BS.
Cassandra:Okay, what you?
Neena:need is to put yourself out there. Social media free, instagram free, facebook free, linkedin free All those things are free. You just have to show up for you. You have to show up in your skillset, in your knowledge, that's it. Okay, the rest of it someone can help you with. You can find somebody on Fiverr, you can hire somebody to do it for you on the side, whatever. But you know what, cassandra? This is one of the things we all use as an excuse, as a barrier, to not do the things we're supposed to be doing. You don't need a website. Nobody needs a website. It's great to have. Once you're establishing big and you, you have all these different tabs and you have so many things you want to show. Okay, great, fine, whatever. But there's even a free website you can do on WordPress and use their free website builder Like stop Right, stop, awesome.
Cassandra:Awesome, neena. This is so, so good. You have definitely given my listeners some actionable steps um how to overcome these personal barriers, and resilience is critical. You got to keep moving, you know. So I just love that. And then you talked about building. What do you say? Value driven, a purposeful life, people, individuals that that want to and know that I want to make an impact, not just the money. I'm not saying money's not important, because your business is yeah, yeah, so I love that. And when you talk about free, I want you to talk about that free gift for my audience.
Neena:Yeah, absolutely, oh, um, did I give you, uh, did I give you the, the, the ebook? Is that what I gave you, the, the free ebook, checklist, right? Yeah? So the free ebook and checklist is, um, uh, basically, uh, a whole format and framework for you to start, if you are looking to start a coaching business, for you to start looking at exactly how to do it. It talks about your niche, your irresistible offer, like how to put it out there, how to find community, like if it has all of that in there. It's completely free and it has a, and it has like timelines for you from from day one to 30, do this. From day 31 through 60, do this, and up to 90 days, and you can have a complete framework done for a business that you want to create when it comes into the coaching space.
Neena:And then I'm giving you a checklist as well to keep you accountable. So, if you are like looking and you're like, oh, let me tell y'all, there's so many great tools out there and a lot of you have a thousand of them on your computer that you don't even open. It's ridiculous, right? So, and I'm, I'm saying it to me too, y'all, so don't think I'm, I'm joking.
Neena:I'm doing the same thing. I have thousands of programs. But here's the thing, like if this is what you want to do, I'm giving you the framework and everything for free. It is for you to have grabbed the framework. It's a whole ebook and it has all the framework in it and the checklist will keep you accountable. And I promise you that if you do the stuff that you're supposed to do one step at a time, one moment at a time, before you know it you have something viable.
Cassandra:Wow, I love that tangible thing. That sounds great. Hey, yeah, so how can my listeners get in touch with you?
Neena:It's super simple. So if you go to Neena Perez, which is spelled N-E-E-N-A Perez, and I mean you'll find me everywhere. And I have a podcast called Straight no Sugar Added that's the name of my business, so you can find me. I mean, literally just Google me, you'll see who I am, you'll find me.
Cassandra:Just Google me, you'll see who I am. You'll find me Awesome, wow, wow. This was great. I loved it because you gave steps, you provided insight. You just wasn't given fluff, you know. It was like you were extremely inquisitive about making sure that the mindset, the three, the mindset the three, what is it? The three step process to transform your life, and I love that and I just I mean, I could keep talking, but we're not, because this is not what this is about.
Cassandra:This is an opportunity for my listeners to hear about all the great work that you do, for my listeners to hear about all the great work that you do. And also, you provided something free, and I love it when you say everything you say. You're making up excuses when you're not taking an action, and I love that, and I just want to thank you, my listeners and the show notes. I'm going to give you a link to her free VIP ebook as a gift to you, and I just don't know what else to say. It's just been so great to have you so fun, my guest, ok, and listeners, I know that Neena has said some things that you have resonated with, so I ask you to please, when you look at this platform.
Cassandra:Share this with your people, that you know, but this will be in their best interest. And I also say if you enjoy this podcast, please put subscribe so that you can hear more and know that all of my podcasts go live every Wednesday at one o'clock pm Eastern Standard Time. Again, neena, thank you All my listeners, as I always say bye for now and God bless you. Thanks again, neena. Thank you for having me.